Thursday, July 30, 2009

Janice Rea


On Saturday, July 25, 2009, Janice Rea made her spiritual transition from our world. In a tragic accident, she fell to her death. Janice was 66 years young, and left behind her son Damon, daughter-in-law Andrea, grandchildren Helena and Riley, and Jim Dohn, the love of her life.

Janice had over 500 numbers in her Blackberry, mostly of people she sponsored or assisted in living sober, free lives. She touched literally thousands of people with her joy, love and aliveness. Her answering machine message says it all, “Hi, it’s Janice Rea. I love my life! Leave a message.”


There will be a memorial service at 4148 Lakewood Dr. Lakewood CA 90712 Saturday, August first at 1:30 pm. Map Inter via Harvey Way off Lakewood Blvd. Bring food.


Donations are being sought to help defray the cost of Search & Rescue and other extraordinary expenses being left to her family. Donations can be made to Janice Rea via paypal -----








This is Jim writing, and here is the story of what happened that day, from my perspective, as I was on the hike as well.


Janice was a graduate of the Sierra Club Wilderness Training, and was very experienced at high altitude hiking and climbing. That day, she was hiking with five of her good friends from her recovery groups, in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.


We arrived Thursday afternoon to set up camp and begin the acclimation process to operating at high altitude. Friday morning we separated into two groups, the quicker stronger group, and the older slower group, and hiked around the Cottonwood basin for the day. This is at approximately 11,000 ft, and is necessary to acclimate. The Old Army Pass appeared to be snow bound at the top and we had decided to not go until we met a group of Boy Scouts and another experienced mountain climber, all of whom said it was easily passable.


Saturday morning we got up early to go over the pass onto 14,000 ft Mt Langley.


We left Muir Lake at about 6:30 am to attempt the climb via the Old Army Pass. The pass trail goes up a steep canyon wall from about 11,000 ft. to an altitude of over 12,000 ft, over a distance of about a mile of switchbacks along the canyon wall.


We kept the group together with Janice and I in the rear to get past the snow and the steep climb. We made it through to the top of the pass with a several hour hike to the peak of Mt. Langley still ahead of us. Because of the altitude, she and two other members of the group, Dave and Gretchen, decided to take a slower pace, with the three remaining members going on ahead. Janice kissed me good bye, with a cheery “Have fun,” and we agreed to rejoin on the way down.


Marriane, Kendall and I made it to the top, and started back down to encounter Dave and Gretchen, who told us that Janice had stopped along the trail and was waiting for us there. This wasn’t unusual for Janice, as she always carried a book to read, should she decide to wait for us at some point on a hike.


We got a call from Janice on the walkie-talkie saying that she wanted to head on down the trail to where the snow was. We told her to wait where she was, and we’d all go down together, but shortly thereafter we received another call saying that she was through the snow. Again, we told her to wait for us, but the next call said that she was half way down. Once again, we told her to wait for us, but she did not.


The snowy part of the trail is scary and difficult, so we all decided to go back around to the dirt and rocks, and avoid the snow patch. About half way down, we got another call from Janice saying, “Help, I’m in trouble, trapped on a ledge.” We yelled for her to stay put, while I grabbed another walkie-talkie and yelled for her as I started running. I never got an answer.


The fall was approximately 200 feet on to rocks, with a slide over snow patches, and onto the canyon chute. I was running down the switchbacks yelling into the walkie-talkie. I could see the disturbance in the snow. I started climbing up the off-trail scree, talus and rock filled chute to get to whatever disturbed the snow.


When I got to her she was twisted, silent, and without a pulse. I couldn’t stop crying. Marrianne had a SPOT for satellite emergency response back at camp that she used to summon help, but we were so remote that when a helicopter arrived three hours later, it was too late to get her out that night. We had to wait for that until Sunday morning.


Saturday night was the longest night of my life. My head was filled with “what if” and “why” and “only if.” I kept hearing Janice’s voice in my head saying, “Hi, this is Janice Rea, I love my life!” That is what is left for me. I Love My Life!


We hiked out on Sunday, and were interviewed by Inyo Search and Rescue before proceeding to the Coroner’s office in Lone Pine to be interviewed again.


I want to acknowledge Lt. Keith Hardcastle of Inyo County Search and Rescue for his loving and thorough attention to detail, and his heartfelt mannerism. I also wish to acknowledge Jeff Mullenhour, the Coroner, for his 46 years on the job as well as his kind and patient way with us. I am truly grateful for these angels.


Janice would be saying “Stay in your heart, and find someone to help,” and she’d be saying it with a lotta love.

61 comments:

  1. What an inspiration Janice is to me as how to live life in your 60's.
    I am sorry for your loss Jim..
    I know she is on the other side, busy, but waiting for you.
    Take care of yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  2. We're all made of star stuff, and what a star Janice was... Every time I look up, I'm certain I can see her.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jim, I am so sorry for your loss. Janice was one of the sweetest, and loving woman I could ever know. The love and sharing that she brought to our Thursday women's meeting will forever be missed. She is a great loss to all! She will forever be an inspiration to me in my AA recovery and in my life. Carla Parr

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Janice it's me Marta...I'm going to miss you sooooooo much it hurts my heart. I can still hear you. I love you. I know you would say "you're so silly" right now while I write this note to you but oh well, I did it anyway...Janice Rea of Sunshine...Thank you so very much for all your love, and all you've taught me. I'll see you later...
    LOVE
    mARTA

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi Janice,

    I will miss you. We will all miss you. You were my eskimo. My inspiration that I could stay sober and get a life; and what a life, thanks to you. You have always been there for me and countless others; always saying the right thing to help me move foward in my life.

    You will always be an inspiration to me. Thanks for all you have given me.


    Ron Banner

    ReplyDelete
  6. Jim, I am so sorry for your loss. My best memories of Janice are of her attending one of the many performances of mine that the two of you would always support me in, and smiling cheering, and tapping her foot enthusiastically to the music. I know that she is now singing and tapping and celebrating with the heavens.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Jim - I'm so sorry about what happened. She was such a wonderful person, I'm glad that I got to meet her. You will be in my thoughts.
    George

    ReplyDelete
  8. Apparently God needed some help up in heaven. He could not have found a more qualified person. She is happy, joyous and truly free. Thank you Janice for the enormous impact you have made on our lives. Love Dennis

    ReplyDelete
  9. Jim, I remember Janice from the old days when we were both pretty new, at Thursdays. She was about a year ahead of me and we were both so crazy...proof that no matter what, we can stay sober if we have each other. She was so knowing, so loving and so sane and sober over these many years, but we never forgot where we came from. Her kindness and compassion for Jaana was so appreciated. Jaana still has a marble that Janice gave her many, many years ago. She will be forever missed.

    ReplyDelete
  10. OMG Jim, I'm so so sorry. I'm in shock. I'll always remember the two of you coming to visit me in London and attending my B-day parties. Thank you for being such supportive friends. I loved Janices energy and fire and will miss her deeply.

    Much Love,
    Diana Brooks

    ReplyDelete
  11. What a loss we have endured- such a vibrant, awesome woman. I cannot believe one misstep has taken her from us. We could always count on a great share from janice, starting with "I'm glad to be here, I'm glad to be anywhere." She has such a special quality of being able to talk about how she wasn't "wrapped too tight" and how far she has come but always the message that we aren't too far away from being crazy again. Such an inspiration: her stories of how such got her job (miracle) and her story about taking the bosses cleaning supplies...I loved them all. I am so sad.

    Love to all, Debbie Wall

    I know she is out there flying in her hovercraft....happy to be anywhere.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Dear Jim, The profound shock I felt when told of Janice's passing was in direct proportion to the love I feel for her. She was so full of life and love. My last fifth step was given to her. She guided and helped me in a way that was in the best tradition of program and beyond. Her intuitive gift was angelic. Sam and I send our love. Marianne Appel

    ReplyDelete
  13. Dearest Jim:

    Please know, even though I did not know Janice, my shock for you is great and my sorrow and love for you, my childhood classmate, is even greater. Janice is now enjoying her existance more than ever. She has completed her purpose and now gets to reap the benefits of the life of love and giving that she lived. You now, need to open your heart to feel the love with which you are surrounded. Know we are all here with you and for you. I hold you in my soul.

    Always classmates, Niki Rowe

    ReplyDelete
  14. I, too, am deeply sorry for your loss. I don't think that anyone who met Janice could ever forget her: her spirit, laughter, love of life and of people, and especially the love she has for you. She is truly one of the most remarkable ladies that I know, and I will never, ever forget her. She was my sponsor for only the past year, but I have so many things that she told me going over and over in my head, and I pray that I never forget these things as they helped me so much. She always knew exactly what to say to help, and she was always reminding me to "Breathe!" In fact, she is the only person I know who realized that I would get nervous or stressed and forget to breathe like I should. She will be sadly missed and forever loved!

    Love you Janice!!
    Debbie Hoff

    ReplyDelete
  15. Jaaaaaanice, I luuuuuuuv youuuuuuuuu,
    Jaaaaaanice, you sweeeeeeeet girl,
    Jaaaaaanice, aha you made me laugh at myself.
    Jaaaaaanice, ru back to flying now?

    Lifted to the clouds and beyond you are
    My tears sorrowful and heavy to earth

    Yum yum girl...backpack in tow
    That peaceful smile caressing our trails.

    I love you Janice....Nancy

    ReplyDelete
  16. Dear Jim: so sorry for your loss. You've been in my prayers and thoughts when i first heard! Janice was the epitome of step 11 to me and I will always remember her words reg. surrender is not approval......she always had a kind word for me and I can never forget her smile and those EYES!! Janice YOU R still blessing those of us still on our journey! Jim LOVE & Light to you be still and know she will always be with you!! Donna

    ReplyDelete
  17. I will miss you Janice. You made a difference in my life, and many other peoople's. As you taught me: keep beautiful memories of someone you've loved and lost, and I will do that with you. And Jim, please let me know if there's anything I can do to help you through this time of grief.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Barbara BannermanJuly 31, 2009 at 3:44 PM

    Dear Judy,
    I was so sorry to hear about Janice's early departure. I know how important she was to you and so many others. I can still see the two of you at my house standing on your heads back to back with your feet touching in partner yoga.
    I don't know if I will be able to fit in a hug as I had already planned a yoga workshop for 1:00 to 5:50. If you are still there, I will drop by after the workshop.
    She was so much more than a friend and I know you will miss her. Remember, you are both fearless, youthful, beautiful spirits and that is the most wonderful way to live and also to depart from this world.
    Let us all die young at an old age, whatever that may be.
    Much Love and Light,
    Barbara

    ReplyDelete
  19. I am sorry I diden't take the time to get to know Janice better. We are all so casual about our time here on earth. We always think we have time with people, when in reality no one knows the time that is left.
    I did enjoy the times we spoke and know she was a light in Alcoholics Anonymous. God's speed Janice, now you are an Angel, looking out for us all.... Rita Chance

    ReplyDelete
  20. The last time I saw her was Saturday in Sierra Madre at my women's meeting. What a surprise it was to see her smiling face sitting across the table. We didn't have time to chat. She told me she looked forward to seeing me on the next trudger trip.
    The sadness didn't hit me until I visited this site and saw her picture and read the story of her last hours. I can't hardly stop the tears.
    She died doing what she loved with people who cared about her. I think her spirit will always be in the mountains with us when we hike.
    Her spirit will be with me when I go out hiking looking out for me in those precipitous places. I will miss her asking for a taste of my latest food creation. I will miss her.............

    ReplyDelete
  21. Dear Jim:

    Caught up in the events of our world, we just this morning got the news, and the loss of Janice has just stopped us. We offer our condolences, and we are grateful for the time we had with you and Janice. Together you have been a wonderful inspiration and hope of the blessings that sobriety can bring to our lives. Janice didn't dwell too much in the "fluff" of the program - she would get right down to nuts & bolts - she didn't have time to waste. When Azeem shared his sober anniversary in January, he included Janice as one of the people contributing to his sobriety through her practical adage: "It's a good thing we aren't all crazy on the same day."

    I first met Janice in 1999 at a retreat where she shared her experience, strength, and hope, lifting us out of ourselves with her wonderful spirit. Flash forward 10 years, and Janice once again entered my life, catching my attention with her practice of joyful living. She was an inspiration to me personally because not only did she say "I trust the process," she lived the process, and always trusted that the result would be right no matter what the pain - it was ultimately about the spiritual connection with our Higher Power.

    With great fondness for you and our memory of Janice,

    Margaret and Azeem

    ReplyDelete
  22. Hi Jim, I never got to meet you but I did know Janice. I remember interviewing her and thinking...wow this lady is full of life and has so much energy. She is different. As I talked to her throughout the months, I remember thinking to myself, I can only hope God will bless me with the grace and zest for life that Janice had. I am so sorry for your lost...

    ReplyDelete
  23. Oh Jim, my heart is broken open. Janice showed e a new way to be in life with her courage and candor, her joy and absolute belief in AA and in herself as a sober woman. Akal, undying, ajoonee, unborn - pure consciousness and bliss and a great big smile. Much love, Joan Richards

    ReplyDelete
  24. I love you Janice and I miss you so much.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Janice and her marbles....... Every birthday I remember her celebrating her way of life she would share her marbles with everyone. She shared her energy, knowledge and experience with so many. I am glad to have known her, and her memory will be with me a long-long time. I hope to see and share with many at the Memorial. My thoughts and support go out to Jim, and her brother Mike. I think she would advise us all to Keep On Trudgin'... Phil Lyon

    ReplyDelete
  26. Janice,
    Drake's party is today he is going off to college.

    Kimberly said hello, so did he.

    I know do it anyway

    ReplyDelete
  27. Chop Wood Carry Water, I finally get it

    Oh, and so much more that is all flooding me that she taught me since 1984.

    Debbie

    ReplyDelete
  28. I still have the little God box on my desk which Janice gave me when I began at Immanuel. I was overwhelmed with the responsibility of it all, and that little box has reminded me so so so often that it is not my burden...I love looking at the marbles and the little stuff in there when I am feling that fear thing rise...What a life force...
    I hope someone can find Jim Kennedy to tell him what has transpired. I have tried and can't find out his contact info.
    Jane Galloway

    ReplyDelete
  29. Jim, I am truly sorry for your loss of a soulmate. The two of you were a match made in heaven as they say. I am truly sorry that I did not get closer to Janice but she made a very profound impact on my life the little things she would say while on the Trudger trips and she always pulled my covers when I was saying things to her. She helped me to see that I was a victim to certain things and because of that I have been working on that and am a survivor instead. She was such a light of AA and will never be replaced. I love her and have totally been blessed by knowing her the little I did. Jim, you are in my thoughts and prayers constantly and I have to say her memorial also will stay with me forever.

    Love you always Janice!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Just last month I had written the words, "Chop wood and carry water," in regards to an online topic. I knew the moment I said it, where it had come from. Janice, thank you for spending time among us. We are all better off for having known you.

    No doubt you'll be showing us the way, when it's our turn to follow.

    Kieth Moreland

    ReplyDelete
  31. The day before Janice died, Dave and I were blessed to spend most of the day with her while Jim and the others did some more challenging hikes. We walked leisurely around several of the lakes, stopped for lunch, hung out in some meadows, and just talked. She and I really connected and it was great getting to know her better - what a beautiful soul.

    It couldn't have been a more glorious day! Blue skies, pristine lakes, gurgling streams, wildfowers, green meadows, and more marmots than I've ever seen before scurrying through the meadows. What a blessing that her last full day on earth was spent in such an incredibly beautiful setting!

    Thank you, Janice, for sharing your joy and your wisdom with me.

    Love, Gretchen

    ReplyDelete
  32. Aloha nui loa. First and foremost I wish to extend my condolences to the family members of Janice R. Jim, I especially extend my sympathies. Janice was a rare gem...a remarkable, classy lady that had great intuition and passion. Her legacy will remain eternal, I suspect, as her sober experience, here on earth was that profound and heartfelt. She will be one of MY very special Angels, forever, until I go to that same Big Meeting in Da Sky....if it be God's will. Love and Peace. Take Care. Aloha a me Malu. Malama pono.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I was unable to speak at the memorial and say all I wanted. I heard so many referrences to her message "I Love My Life."

    I wanted to say that and that it be known, thought I doubt there is any doubt, that you, her friends, family, those who have had lives she was a part of, is the reason she loved her life.

    When thoughts go back to that message, you should all know that being able to be a part of all yours, as you were a part of hers, if the reason she loved her life.

    Thanks to all who have let her be be a part of your life in whichever way, as she truly cherished being a part of all of yours.

    Billy

    ReplyDelete
  34. Linda Fuhrman NewtonAugust 2, 2009 at 7:21 PM

    Jim--I am very sorry about the loss of your dear friend, Janice-know that you are in our thoughts and prayers--I will be thinking of you and your friends-remember that we are here for you--
    Love Linda Fuhrman Newton

    ReplyDelete
  35. Janice was a compasionate and understanding gift to those who knew her. I hadn't seen Janice in person for probably 7 years yet getting her wonderful emails made it feel like I saw her regularly. My deepest condolences to her son, her grandchildren and family. Although a long distant relationship, I will very much miss knowing she is just a click away. The void she leaves behind will be felt by many.

    Barbara Arenaza in SC

    ReplyDelete
  36. Jim,

    I’m sorry I can’t attend Janice’s memorial service. I had previously committed to go to another service with one of my sponsees. I have no explanation of why these things happen. When I told John A. that I was an atheist. He responded “I can’t believe we go through this for nothin’”. I’ve been hanging on to that thought for 28 years. I believe that this is the way things should be even if I don’t have the intelligence to understand the plan.

    Love ,

    Mike

    ReplyDelete
  37. Jim,

    We are sitting here with tears coming down. We would love to be there to support you and your family, and let you know how much we love you.

    We have committments today, but you will definitely be in our thoughts. Her spirit is like a blanket manifesting itself everytime someone reacts based in her influence, and they in turn influence someone around them. Years from now her name may not be known by those influenced, but her legacy is the path she helped them forge.

    Our hearts are so with you. Love, Thetis and Keith -

    ReplyDelete
  38. Doctor Dohn

    Lisa told me about your loss. I'm so sorry to hear about it. What a tragedy! I don't really have any words for you besides these...just wanted to let you know I'm here for you if you need anything.

    --
    RD

    ReplyDelete
  39. Jim--

    We are so very sorry for your loss. Janice was a gift. And to see so many people whom she touched at the memorial was astonishing. She inspired and helped so many people, from so many diffeent walks of life. Her legacy of love lives on.

    Our love and blessings to you, your friends and family at this difficult time.... Greg Vogel

    ReplyDelete
  40. Dear John -- I am so sorry to hear of your loss . My heart goes out to you . I'm not there but if I was would come to the memorial . She and I exchanged funny Emails all the time . She was an important part of my sobriety and ongoing efforts at rehabilitation . I am sorry for your pain and grief . I send you my love and support . I will say a prayer for you .
    Tif

    ReplyDelete
  41. My Dearest Jim,

    Just learning the news about Janice, I too I am so sad and sorry for your loss.

    My prayer for her easy transition back to spirit, holding her with love and appreciation.
    Enveloping you with my loving and support, from my heart to yours.
    Know you are well loved and not alone at this time.
    So many loved Janice and I will surely miss not seeing her with you in embodied form.

    I will not be at the CEW this year at the end of August in So. Cal. but know you are near and dear to me.
    I will keep the both of you with me as I flow down the Trinity river this weekend.

    Virtual hugs and kisses,
    Estie

    ReplyDelete
  42. Dear Jim,

    I had only met Janice the weekend prior to her passing when we were at the All 12-Step Women's Retreat in Sierra Madre. When I saw her I thought, "Wow, that lady's got some funky hair and great spunk to go along with it!" Her story made over 60 women laugh when she shared a part of it with us on Saturday night. I will be forever grateful for having the chance to meet her and to have had a glimpse of her wonderful spirit. She will be remembered in my heart each year that I attend that retreat.

    I was unable to make the memorial but my blessings and prayers go out to all of you that she left behind.

    Fondly,

    April Jones-Shelly

    ReplyDelete
  43. Rose,
    I am just getting a lot of, "She really, really wants him to know that she didn't want to leave now, but that she could not stay any longer." That the energy of the karma in her body was running the show more than her will.
    Richard


    On Aug 5, 2009, at 1:00 PM, sandra davis wrote:


    Richard,
    I spoke with Jim today, told him of the communications we both had received from Janice. He was receptive, and seemed to be comforted by the thought she had fainted when she fell. He said that someone else had gotten a message from her, and had relayed it to him. He was interested in the fern garden. He said they had recently taken out a concrete patio, and planted corn, squash and edibles. He also was able to sleep the night through last night.
    Rose

    ReplyDelete
  44. Jim,

    Jean K gave me the news last night. I am sorry for your loss. I did not know Janice well, but I remember her bright spirit, and your happiness together. I'm planning a trip to the area where she fell over Labor Day weekend. I will pause the group and take a some time to remember her, and wish her peace on her journey.

    Sharon

    ReplyDelete
  45. I write this to myself, for I am here left in the physical world without you, Janice. It has taken me time to find the words behind the tears, but what I am left with is my own selfishness. I want you here to talk to, to be an inspiration, to be a friend and to be everything that you are.
    You still had so much to give to others, to your grandchildren, to me. As time passes, I realize you have given me so much more. I have the opportunity to live freely, happily, and as an inspiration to others.
    Not to worry, Janice, I am here for Jim, Damon, and the kids, we will always love and remember you. You are always with me...
    Andrea Baggs

    ReplyDelete
  46. Its me your best friend we were suppose to rock on the front porch together like that was really going to happen with our energy level! But we were suppose to spend many years wandering the trails of happy destiny.I miss you Janice.Thanks for being there for me always.Love Judy

    ReplyDelete
  47. Janice,
    You know what I am doing, I don't even have to telll you. I just can't stop thinking about you, and you everywhere I go.You loaned me "The Space Ship" long long ago, and I just might ride in there for awhile, it's safe sometime for all of us.

    Chop Wood Carry Water,
    I remain Fierce

    ReplyDelete
  48. Janice,
    I have finally made a God Box like you asked me to so many times, wish I could show it to you! And, so many times when I go to bed I pick up my phone to call you and leave a message, and then I remember... I still have such a hole in my heart from missing you. And, Jim, I hope you are okay. If I can do anything for you please call me.
    Love,
    Debbie Hoff

    ReplyDelete
  49. Dear Jim,
    Janice was one of the finest people I ever had the good fortune of meeting and getting to know. She was so full of energy and love and I knew right away I wanted the type of sobriety she had. I asked her the first day I met her to be my sponser and she said yes and was always there for me. She had such a loving heart, She never judged, she just accepted me as I was. Nor did she give up on me when so many others had. I will always be grateful to her for that. I will miss her greatly. Jim I hope you and her family are able to find comfort in knowing how much she was loved by so many people.
    Love Always,
    Janet
    Janet

    ReplyDelete
  50. Hi everyone This is April..:) Janice's babie she taught me new words like NOMBA(none of my Buisness anyway) and how to live with a smile nd to remember to LIVE/LOVE/BREATHE and to slow down with the turtles fly like a butterfly and LOVE with all my heart.."Im there for those of you who understand" and know i can move a lil bit more ..Love you Jim/Mary Jo /Guiermo?/ cya me

    ReplyDelete
  51. Janice,
    Glad this is hear so I can talk to you, well I talk to you anyway. I need you to help me, and I know you will. /We have always been so connected on such a level that we never even had to talk.

    ReplyDelete
  52. HiJim, Janice was one of my first sponsors in OA. She gave me my first Big Book, and signed it years ago (1988). Through her guidance I was got a spiritual and practical upbringing in 12 step that is the foundation for my program. Also it was with Janice's guidance that I was able to reach peace with my mother while she was still alive after a lifetime of turbulence . I had no regrets nor were any iusses left undone when she passed on. This was a gift of program that came to me because I listened to Janice who was an exceptional channel for the spirit of AA.
    The last time I talked to Janice, she called me to ask me a question about a book she was sure I had, but which I had lost. I cannot get over that she is gone. She is still alive in all that I learned from her. I still hear her voice and words. Thank G-d that she was part of my journey in life.
    I have never met you, and just barely knew her son, but I can feel what a tremenous loss it is not to have a close companion close any more. If it is any consolation, I still felt the presence of my father and mother for years after their deaths on special occasions. Plus, Janice affected so many people, there's Janice in many of the living around you... So, even though her physical presence is gone, she is still here.
    I regret not being there for her memorial. But I will never forget Janice Rea.
    Your friend, Linda K.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Janice,
    Someone was talking about another person who
    had just died, and was counting the number of deaths in the past year we have lost in AA.

    I still do not believe your gone, damn you I want you hear you always have the answers. I never understood what you were saying, it just felt so safe just lying next to you on your bed.

    I still see you driving around town, and see you at Ralph's, if the food is that bad, then just come , and I will get you anything you want from where ever you want me to get it.I will also make you hard boiled egss all
    different colors.

    The little one's just don't know this stuff, and I keep getting lost, and I know you know
    why, shit your the only one who really does know everything right now. I reaaly believe we are even at this point in the game.

    I love you, and then all of a sudden felt all this anger, and rage come up, what's up with that. Your the one that's always helps everyone with grieving, so help me through all this crap.

    Talk to you later,
    Debbie

    ReplyDelete
  54. liquid love pouring from my eyes
    thinking of you
    mj

    ReplyDelete
  55. I can't believe she is gone. She taught me how to be crazy and sit with it until I became sane. She told me we will love you until you can love yourself. A lifetime ago. I can't believe she is gone. RIP Janice, I can only imagine the amazing adventures you are having in the beyond. I have so many stories of times with her, I lived in her home for a few months, years ago. I need to find MJ, if anyone knows where I can find her, tell her Becky is looking for her. She must have been heartbroken to lose her dear friend.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Happy Birdy to Ewe
    the tears are coming
    have fun with max, mom's dog
    he joined you on monday
    mj

    ReplyDelete
  57. What a potent chunk of heart is missing in this world. As time goes by, just memories and sweet thoughts in those empty places.
    Kathy

    ReplyDelete
  58. I wasn't there and did not know her. But do know she was someone special in Jim and your lives and at the end, had what she always wanted-your love.
    That's what we all want and that's why we do the journey. Love and acceptance.

    She finally had both.

    ReplyDelete
  59. 20years today--one day at a time--one breath at a time--one teardrop at a time---one belly laugh at a time--so grateful-thanks for being part of the ride!
    mj

    ReplyDelete
  60. I'm thinking of you today and will always remember you with love and respect. There are no words to describe how much I miss you. It's almost a year now since you went home and I know where ever you are they're blessed to have you. I will never forget you and your love.

    ReplyDelete
  61. I moved away from Long Beach several years ago, and I just now today learned of Janice's untimely and very sad death. We ran together to meetings, to operas in LA, to wherever the wind blew us. We both, though, TREASURED our sobriety and our friendship, with each other and between ourselves. I am just heartbroken and bewildered. Janice, I need a tea party with you; I need to watch silly movies with you; I need to understand how you were taken from us so early. I love you, Seester. What a powerful AA message-carrier you were, and still are!!!
    -- Holly Harmon

    ReplyDelete